Wondering what a SAHM (stay-at-home Mom) does all day? Before I became one, I wondered the same thing.
I was really looking forward to slow, relaxing days, sipping coffee and baby snuggles, but reality set in quick and I realized it was a lot more challenging than I thought. At first, to be honest, I really struggled. I was dealing with some postpartum anxiety from lack of sleep and just in general the major change that motherhood brings, and was having a really hard time being alone everyday. When you leave a career to stay home, it is almost like your whole life as you know it completely flips upside down and it takes time to get used to. Obviously, it is great in a lot of ways, but it can also be challenging.
BUT, once I got in a flow, I started really enjoying it. This did take a while. When my son, Luke, was little, I was home a lot. As he got older and went down to one nap, we really started being able to do a lot more. You will always have your harder days, but here are my top tips for adjusting to being a SAHM and my daily schedule that helps me enjoy being home.
*Disclaimer*: I mention this at the bottom, but you WILL have weeks that no schedule can happen and your routines go out the window. It’s so funny because anytime I write something, I normally have a few weeks that challenge exactly what I wrote. The last few weeks have been crazy for our family and we have just been doing what we can each day. Anytime you are dealing with sickness, loss, changes, etc., give yourself grace, rest, and relax. You will be able to get back in the swing of things eventually.
Have A Good Realistic Daily Schedule/Routine
A good schedule is KEY. When you have one, you can actually do so much more. And, I have found that kids are actually very adaptable, BUT, they do much better behavior-wise when they know what to expect and have some routine.
Below is how our day normally looks. This schedule has been one we have followed since Luke turned about 1.5. I try to use block scheduling because it is the most flexible type of schedule. I learned about this concept from Jordan Page at funcheaporfree.com. It is a game-changer. She has an entire video dedicated to it, which I highly recommend.
*At the bottom of this post, I linked the free blank schedule that I created that was inspired by hers.
Block scheduling stops you from micro-managing your day but it also keeps you focused. Once a time block is over, you stop doing the things in that time block and move to the next. It doesn’t matter if you are finished with the previous block or not. You stop and move on. This really helps you stay focused in your day and stay more productive because you know you only have a scheduled block of time to do certain tasks.
Even if you work from home or work outside the home, you can utilize this. I actually started doing this when I worked outside the home and it was so helpful to me! It can be helpful to anyone if you adapt it to your own schedule.
Realize That You Are Fulfilling A Great Purpose
Before we had kids, Colton and I always knew that I would probably stay home. It was an easy decision for us. When you know that God has called you to do something, whether that’s staying home or working outside the home, you can do something without caring what other people think or without worry about being provided for. God always provides when you listen to what He has called you to do and you obey. I don’t struggle with feeling less than because I stay home right now because I know I was meant to do it. Do I still want to fulfill other things and accomplish other things as well? Yes, and that’s ok as long as I keep first things first.
So whether you are a SAHM, work from home mom, or work outside the home mom, as long as you are doing what God has called you to do, you are absolutely fulfilling a great purpose and you never have to apologize for that!
Do Activities With Your Child
Have fun with your child! There are sooo many opportunities when you are a stay-at-home Mom. Some things we really enjoy are:
- weekly Kindermusik classes
- playdates
- long morning walks
- discovering new playgrounds
- the library
- mall runs (of course lol…but I do try to limit this to once a week)
We try to stay busy and active. Winter definitely is more challenging, but this year I’m looking forward to joining our town’s new indoor rec area. Just do something fun! The days are what you make them.
Be Grateful
If you stumbled upon this article, you are probably searching for a way to gain some control back in your day and feel less chaotic. Without gratitude and a good attitude, the best of days still won’t be enough for you. Realize how blessed you are to stay home. Every day may not be easy and there are definitely a lot of harder parts of being a SAHM. But, remember, the things worth while aren’t the most convenient things and they aren’t the easiest things.
Make Health A Priority
This one is pretty self-explanatory. If you don’t feel good, everything else gets more challenging. Some things that I know that really help me are moving my body each day and making sure my diet is higher in protein and lower in refined carbs and sugar. Your emotional and spiritual health also play a huge part in this. Take time each day to read the Word of God and pray for guidance in your day.
Have Hobbies Or Something For Yourself
One thing that really bothered me early on was the fact that I felt like everything was so repetitive. Each week, you are doing the same laundry, the same dishes, and cleaning up the same messes and it’s hard to see any type of achievement. What really helped me was getting involved in activities and doing things that I enjoyed. Motherhood in itself is a gigantic accomplishment, but sometimes when you’re in the middle of it, it’s hard to see the fruit of your labor.
Here are a few extra things that I’ve done since I’ve had my son that will hopefully give you some ideas :
- joined the “Get It All Done” Mom’s club
- led a Mom’s group at our church and also was a part of another group at our church
- started taking an online Bible course
- started this blog
- sold some products
- learned how to cook new things from scratch
- planted an herb garden
- read lots of books
- started serving in Kids Ministry at our church
- started lots of house projects
- worked on photography
- learned all about planting certain flowers and plants, etc.
There are so many things you start having time to learn when you are a SAHM. I have expanded so many homemaking skills over the last two years.
Take Time For Yourself Each Day
One of the best tips I learned over the last year (from the Get It All Done Club), was to take a break when your child is napping or having quiet time. During this time, I read, work on this blog, cook, listen to a podcast, watch some of my favorite YouTubers, or do a house project that I’m excited about. The point being, I don’t do anything like housework or anything that isn’t restful to me.
Luke is down to an hour nap each day now, but when he stops napping, I will still expect him to have quiet time in his room. I know this will be easier said than done lol, so you have to do what works for you. This is something you have to teach and train them in and put some effort into, but a break is a must for me. Over the past few years, I have done different schedules where Luke had quiet time where he played in his crib if he was dropping a nap.
Shift With The Seasons
With any changes life brings, or during busier times of the year or different developmental changes with your child, you have to give yourself grace to adjust. There was a week about a month ago when Luke just stopped napping. For a whole week, he literally would not nap and he had been previously napping for 1.5 hours each day. So to lose 1.5 hours of a break each day felt hard. We ended up shortening his nap to an hour and that ended up fixing it, but during that week, I had to make some adjustments.
I hope this inspires you and helps you realize that staying at home with your kids is a gift and is opportunity to impact them each day. We can look at it like it’s something hard or see it as a blessing. I choose blessing.
-nicole
